


This Years Love

by a_grumpy_kitty



Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Angst, Break Up, References to Depression
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-21
Updated: 2019-03-21
Packaged: 2019-11-26 18:26:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,542
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18184163
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/a_grumpy_kitty/pseuds/a_grumpy_kitty
Summary: Diego thinks a part of him always knew they'd end in flames, burning too fast and too bright. It was only a matter of time before it got out of control.





	This Years Love

**Author's Note:**

> the title is named after the song that plays in the one Scene™️ Between patch and diego. you know the one.

Diego thinks a part of him always knew they'd end in flames, burning too fast and too bright. It was only a matter of time before it got out of control. He was brash, quick to react with a bad temper and an attitude to match. She was assertive, calculated, followed the rules but wasn't afraid to speak up. Eudora was the one who always said they shouldn't take it further, should leave it as casual as they could. But Diego was Diego so he had to push. Pushed to go out for real, pushed to make it official, to tell their friends, to move in together. It was good for a while. Stable, something Diego had never truly had before. So of course, when the reality of a future and the promise of something long-term and good came into play, Diego lit a match and burned it to ash. First, it was coming home late, covered in blood and bruises, then it was getting himself kicked out of the police academy two months before graduating. It was fighting every night and sleeping on the couch a week at a time. The already wearing dangerously thin thread finally snapped the night Diego came home, well after midnight, shit-faced with bloody knuckles and a gash running from behind his ear to just above his cheekbone. Eudora had spent the night screaming at him as she stitched up his wound and packed her bags. His drunken, last-ditch efforts to make her stay did nothing but make her decision easier. At 8 am the next morning, Eudora Patch walked out the front door of her apartment and didn't look back. And if she did, Diego didn't need to know about it.  
He wasn't sure how long it had been since Eudora left. Maybe a few days, maybe a week, maybe longer. He hadn't left the apartment since she had. He knew rent was due soon, and he also knew he wasn't able to pay it so he savored his last few days of living in a real home. He hadn't slept in the bed since she left. It didn't feel right without her there. He knew, logically, he had no place to complain. This was his fault entirely. He drove her away, the promise of happiness to daunting and intimidating. He flipped through the paper, scouring help wanted ads knowing he would need to start working soon. And probably find a place to live. He wouldn't be able to afford this apartment with only him paying the bills. Eudora's words would float back into his brain on occasion, haunting him and tightening in his chest. Selfish, self-destructive, never knew when to stop. She was right, she always was. He couldn't take this moping around anymore. He needed to go out, clear his head. Just let the sadness and self-resentment he refused to admit he was feeling roll off. He got dressed for the first time in days, he even gelled his hair up a little and pulled on a jacket. He tucked a knife or two into his boots and pockets, just in case, and headed out. With his headphones blasting in his ears, he let himself walk, not caring where he was going or where he ended up. Eudora always hated that about him. She hated not having a plan, always wanted to know where they were going and how they'd get there. Diego walked until his legs began to burn, finally slowing down when the area around him began to look achingly familiar. He walked another block before realizing where he was. He stopped in front of golden gates, tan stone stretching upwards and out for a mile around him. Of course, he would end up here, of all places. Maybe if he listened to Eudora and planned his path, he could have avoided ending up here. He stared at the umbrella carved into the smooth metal. He hadn't been back since he left, 5 years ago now. He tried his best to forget it all but now, with the weight of a broken heart, and yes it was his own doing but that didn't make it hurt any less, everything overwhelmed him. Years of trauma came flooding back, mixing with the pain of Eudora leaving and his life coming undone because of his own broken brain. He felt frozen, trying his hardest to stop trembling and just move, just keep walking but he couldn't. For a brief second, he thought about going inside, seeing Dad and Pogo. He bet Luther was still there too. And mom. Mom. He squeezed his eyes shut and willed away the quickly approaching tears. He was willing to bet if he went around the back and came through the door in the kitchen that Mom would be in there. He could safely avoid Sir Reginald that way, knowing the old man never went down there when they were kids and Diego was willing to bet that hadn't changed. He only would have to worry about Luther and Pogo but if he was lucky, Pogo would be with dad as usual and Luther would be on a mission. Diego stalked around the back of the house, avoiding any windows looking out onto the street in case anyone was there. Reaching the back of the house, he peered through a dusty window into the vintage kitchen. The lights were dim, but there she was, stirring a large pot of something over the stove. Diego's heart tugged a bit, the guilt of leaving her here filling him up. She stood tall and beautiful as she always did, humming to herself. Not a blonde hair out of place and her red lipstick applied perfectly. Diego stood a long, anxiety-educing breath as he pushed the creaky door open. Grace pivoted on her heels in surprise, eyes widening as she turned to the door. Diego worried for a moment that Hargreeves had erased him from her memory, the look on her face was one of unrecognition. He opened his mouth but nothing came out. But then something in her face changed. Her features softened again and she smiled brightly.  
"Diego dear! How lovely to see you!"  
The tears that had been forced back finally let themselves roll down his cheeks at the sound of his mother's voice. He moved quickly across the linoleum floor, wrapping his arms around her middle and sobbing into her shoulder. She stilled momentarily before closing her arms around him, one softly stroking his hair while she shushed him.  
"Diego, what's wrong?" Her voice remained cool and even, running the arm not in his hair along his back. He let out a heavy sob before pulling back. He wiped the tears from his face and the snot from his nose before he began to speak.  
"I f-fucked up-"  
"Language, please."  
"Right, sorry. I messed up real bad. I had something good and I screwed it up because I always do, I always d-d-destroy good things, I don't know w-w-w-what's w-wrong with me, Mom." Tears were still running down his face as he forced his words out. His stutter always came back thick when he was upset. Grace looked at him with sorrowful eyes before pulling out a chair and sitting him down. She sat beside him and took his trembling hand into her own. He looked up at her with wide, glossy eyes.  
"There's nothing wrong with you, my beautiful Diego. Everything takes time to figure out."  
"She's never g-going to forgive me. I'll never forgive myself for putting her through all of it. She deserved so much better, I was so selfish. I s-sh-should have just manned up and ended it before I destroyed everything. G-god I'm such a coward."  
"My brave boy, you're anything but a coward. You made mistakes, as all humans do. You were scared, and there's nothing wrong with being scared sometimes. The best you can do is apologize and explain. If she decides to not forgive you, that's a choice she'll make and something you have to accept. Make your peace and hope it's enough. And if it isn't, at least you tried." Grace stood up, as she finished her sentence and placed a gentle kiss onto the top of Diego's head. She turned back to check her soup, simmering on the stove. She listened to the quiet sobs and sniffles of Diego as she began to ladle the soup into three bowls.  
"Would you like to stay for dinner, Diego? I'm sure everyone would be happy to see you."  
"I can't, Mom. I better get going before it gets dark. Thank you." He stood as he spoke. He gave Grace a final hug before he turned towards the door.  
"It was nice seeing you, Mom. I l-l-love you." He pushed the door open and escaped into the cool autumn air. He looked back through the window as the door shut. He watched Grace finish waving him goodbye before placing the bowls onto a tray and ringing her dinner bell. Making his way back home, Diego thought over his mother's words. He picked up some envelopes and stamps on the way back. Maybe Eudora wouldn't forgive him but at least he would try.


End file.
